Thursday, December 17, 2009

Conflict

Interpersonal conflict:
- disagreement between or among connected individuals: close friends, lovers, or family members.

Nature of Conflict:
- Conflict is inevitable.
- If the conflict is approached properly, the relationship may not be hurt but may be improved as a result of the conflict's resolution.

Effects of Conflict:
  • Negative effect:
    • Conflicts involve unfair fighting methods.
    • Focus largely on hurting the other person.
  • Positive effect:
    • Examine a problem and work toward a potential solution.
    • Productive conflict strategies makes your relationships become stronger, healthier, and more satisfying than it was before.
    • Win-win solutions.
    • Thus, confronting a conflict often indicates concern, commitment and a desire to protect and preserve the relationship.

Content and Relationship Conflicts:
  • Content Conflicts:
    • Centers on objects, events, and persons in the world that are usually external to the people involved in the conflict.
    • Common issues that you argue and fight about everyday.
    • For example, Two siblings who argue about watching different channels on television.
  • Relationship Conflicts:
    • Include conflicts concerned with the relationships between the individuals, with issues as who is in charge, the equality or lack of it in the relationship, and who has the right to establish rules of behavior.
    • For example, A younger brother who does not obey his elder brother.
    • Relationships conflicts are often hidden and give a false appearance as content conflicts.
Six major issues for relationships conflict:
  1. Intimacy such as affection(feeling love) and sex.
  2. Power issues such as excessive demands or possessiveness, lack of equality in the relationship, friends, and leisure time.
  3. Personal imperfection such as drinking or smoking, grooming, and driving style.
  4. Personal distance issues such as frequently being absent and school or job commitments.
  5. Social issues such as politics, parents, and personal values.
  6. Distrust issues such as romantic affairs and lying.
Four issues most often argued between same-sex and opposite-sex friends:
  1. Sharing living space or possessions.
  2. Breaking friendship rules.
  3. Sharing activities.
  4. Disagreement about ideas.

Culture and Conflicts:
  • Culture influences the topics people fight about as well as what are considered appropriate and inappropriate ways to dealing with conflict.
  • The topics of conflicts depend on whether the culture is high or low context.
    1. High-context Culture:
    2. - conflicts are more likely to center on breaking collective or group norms and values.
    3. Low-context Culture:
    4. - conflicts are more likely come up when individual norms are broken.
  • The cultural norms of an organization will also influence the types of conflicts that occur and the ways in which they may be dealt with.
    1. Individualistic culture:
    2. For example, American managers deal with workplace conflict by seeking to integrate the demands of the different sides.
    3. Collectivist culture:
    4. For example, Chinese managers are more likely to call on higher management to make decision or to leave the conflict unresolved.

Gender and Conflict:
Men Women
- More likely to withdraw from a conflict, often coupled with a denial that anything is wrong.

- More likely to fight when they were offended by the words used.

- More logical when they argue.

- Defined as conflict "thinkers".

- Less likely to reveal negative feelings.

- Want to get closer to the conflict, they want to talk about it and resolve it.

- More easily offended by language.

- More emotional when they argue.

- Defined as conflict "feelers".

- More likely to reveal negative feelings.

Conflict Resolution Stages:

Preparing to resolving conflict:

  1. Try to fight in private.
  2. Be sure you are each ready to fight.
  3. Know what you are fighting about.
  4. Fight about problems that can be solved.

Stages in Conflict Resolution:
  1. Stage One: Define the conflict.
    1. Define both content and relationship issues.
    2. Define the problem in specific terms.
    3. Focus on the present.
    4. Empathize.
    5. Avoid mind reading.
  2. Stage Two: Examine Possible Solution.
  3. Stage Three: Test the Solution.
  4. Stage Four: Evaluate the solution.
  5. Stage Five: Accept or Reject the Solution.








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